~ ***** a fox chat ***** ~ [Now: Weirdest writing advice you have ever received?]

This forum is actually the only social media I use now. I deleted all my other accounts for the sake of my mental health. I wasn’t using most of them anymore anyhow, and was worried about hackers breaking into them and stealing my identity like they did on Wattpad back in the day. (Not to me, but to some users who’d abandoned their accounts.)

I am on the following sites, but I don’t use them as social networks, just for keeping track of my writing:

GoodreadsNaNoWriMoDreamwidthNeoCities

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I started using social media to connect with old friends. It technically started with Myspace, but then everyone I knew began using Facebook. This was when I was 12-13 years old. The point of me using Facebook was to keep in touch with people every time I moved. I’d been to fourteen different public schools throughout my adolescence, and at the time, I didn’t have a cell phone, but I used a computer and an iPod Touch, so it made sense to use it to keep in touch with them. Message them, laugh at memes we’d find, and so on.

But then my friends wouldn’t message back or would only have quick, non-interested conversations, so Facebook to me turned into a place where I kept old photos, find ideas for things (like interior design stuff or pretty castles, etc.) and a place where I could just talk to the void. Sometimes, I get people interacting with my posts, but most of the time it’s family. And sometimes, I do see old friends making posts about things going on in their life, and I love seeing that. While yes, it can make me sad and discouraged because these things are often positive and about them growing up and getting their life together (unlike myself), I love seeing them grow. I had a friend post about her getting engaged, then she eventually got married, they recently announced being pregnant and buying their first house. I had other friends who posted about buying or paying off their first cars. I even have an online friend on Facebook who I’ve never met before in person, but we met as kids on a girlie dress-up game website. She’s three years younger than me—I was about 12-13, she was about 10-11—and she’s been my Facebook friend ever since. I’ve seen her practically grow up—from graduating high school to getting her first job to getting into college… it’s kind of a surreal experience, but also really cool.

By the time I turned nineteen, I had my first cell phone and I was introduced to SnapChat and Instagram. I don’t use Instagram much—never really did. But in the beginning of it, I used it as a way to promote my books since there was a huge Wattpad readership on there at the time. I then also tried to use it for motivational purposes in regards to losing weight, since there were quite a few people on there who documented their weight loss journeys. Didn’t quite work out the way I thought. xD It started off good, but then we moved, I wasn’t losing weight at all, and I got discouraged and quit. :rofl:

SnapChat also became a form of marketing for me since I post videos and photos of me writing or reading. But, similarly to Facebook, I also use it as a place to keep old photos because I do take a lot of photos or videos from my personal life and share it on there as well but also keep them. I don’t have dozens of people view my Snaps—it’s mostly family and a few friends, but because I post them as “public,” I get people who follow me see it as well.

TikTok and Threads have also become my marketing platforms. On the same token, though, I’ve also used social media—even YouTube—as a way to connect with other writers and readers. I don’t really have friends in real life, and the people I know in real life aren’t big into reading and aren’t writers. So it’s kind of hard to talk about this massive part of who I am with people.

I do. While there’s obviously bad things about social media (like trolls), it’s actually been a great influence in my life because it’s helped me realize I’m not alone… in many various aspects.

I’d be sad. xD

I mean, I lived without social media for a good portion of my life. Sure I had Facebook when I was a teenager, but I didn’t have a cell phone until I was nineteen. The only times I went on Facebook was whenever I had a laptop with me, and then by the time I turned 14-16 years old, I had an iPod Touch but it was mostly used for playing games and listening to music. I didn’t really use it for getting on social media. So, I can live without it and have, technically. But on the same token, I’d be sad simply because I don’t have the connection I do online. I get to talk to so many writers and readers online, and I don’t get that in real life. So if social media randomly disappeared one of these days, I’d just feel like there’s a hole in my life that needs to be filled.

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I posted this on Facebook, and wanted to bring it over here.

Topic: Do you relate to these thoughts on the “ask friends and family to read” advice?

So, when I go to writing advice articles, occasionally, I’d see suggestions like this, with no additional talk about what to do if you don’t have such close support.

It’s great if you have friends and family who would be willing to read your 50 to 100k novel. I envy people who have people who would just do that without anything in return.

Because, I don’t have that. My parents don’t accept me as a writer. I also live in Japan and none of my friends are fluent enough in English to read a fantasy novel. My partner can understand English but not enough to read a book.

Sometimes I’m not fine with this situation. So, I feel a little sad when I see advice like “ask family and friends to read”, with nothing about if you don’t have that. I also think about newbies. Writing for newbies can be quite isolating. What if they also don’t have close support and don’t know what to do when they’re stuck?

Must be lonely and scary. I think those advice sites should put a bit in about where to go if you don’t have close support.

One solution is joining groups on Facebook or writing forums like this one :blush:

As for me, I’ve learned to be fine with my situation. It’s not the greatest, but it’s better than nothing, and even though my partner can’t read English novels, at least he’s willing to listen to my translated-into-Japanese rambles from time to time :wink:

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i get you on that one!

my family do not read books, and my friends, they’re not interested in reading mystery/thrillers and even if they say they will read it, i’m always afraid they wouldn’t get into it or it wouldn’t be interesting to them and since they’re not into it, i feel like, therefore they won’t be able to give specific feedback that i need and want.

but i do have people online that i met through wattpad who were also in a similar situation and therefore, i would connect with them, read their work, give them feedback and they’d be all for it, especially newbies. i didn’t mind working on my own stories by myself without feedback, without family/friends but i wanted to be that person for other people. i helped a couple new authors, and i try to worm my way into new author’s dm’s to help them if they want it because i feel like they would be too scared to ask.

the thing is, i do think that advice is flawed anyway. do you really think your family/friends wouldn’t just say it’s good because they just want to support you and make you feel like you’re doing well? i feel like our families and friends are biased, they’re more likely to say they enjoyed our work as long as we’re happy to hear it. i don’t think they’d give actual constructive criticism or would actually be interested in the book themselves, especially if they aren’t avid book-readers.

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I’m in the same boat. My parents know I write, but I don’t think they take it very seriously. My mother used to ask to read my books whenever I’d finish one, but she said something later to someone else that indicated she only read them thinking that’s what a good mother does, yanno? Good parents support their children’s efforts, yadda yadda, so she likely forced herself to read them without actually liking them. I never tell her when I finish a book now because I don’t want anyone reading my books who isn’t really into them. She’s into cozy mysteries and Hallmark Channel stuff, so I doubt she likes my work. My dad has no interest at all, and doesn’t even pretend. (♯^.^ღ)

But that’s fine! It’s kinda creepy to have your parents read your work, actually, so I’m glad they don’t. I don’t have any other friends or family in Florida, so that means it’s strangers or no one. I wish there was a way to use AI to put our books in front of people who might be interested in those genres, but it looks like that’s something for a century from now, when all the books are totally written by AI anyway. ¯\_(ﭢ)_/¯

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It’s best to ask advice from people who are experienced. You don’t ask six-year-olds how to take care of newborn babies, or at least, you shouldn’t.

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My sister reads my stories, but its mainly when I ask her if she can proofread them before posting on WP. She’s been very helpful and supportive even though reading novels isn’t her thing, as she prefers comics. Mom read through the first couple chapters of my novel out of interest but stopped after a while. She’s supportive of my writing (and even dabbled into writing flash fiction), but I’m guessing it simply wasn’t the sort of stories she likes.

Dad supports my hobbies but isn’t a book reader, so he’s never read my stuff.

Lastly, my boyfriend read through the vast majority of my novel (as fantasy is his favorite genre), and knows how it ends since I rambled to him about it :joy: He’s also aware that I’m writing another novel and the ideas I have for it, but since I haven’t posted it anywhere yet, well, he’s not read it yet. Also helps that he’s written stories and DM’ed for a DnD campaign in the past, so occasionally we talk about what we’ve written or ramble about ideas, characters, etc.

Overall, I don’t like forcing any family or friends to read my stuff, but they’re welcome to if its something they’re interested in. In a sense I relate to that advice, but also think it’s not the only way to get support/feedback for your craft, especially if family/friends don’t support it (which is very sad)

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You guys have any weird writing advice you received?

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https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ChandlersLaw

If you can find something weirder, I’d like to see it.

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Not sure how that’s weird. Do you mean someone told you to introduce some unrelated drama?

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In a sense, yes.

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Oh, yes! I remember this one. A variation on it from the same author is to have a dead body turn up whenever the plot slows down. So in The Big Sleep the chauffeur is unexpectedly murdered, but no one is ever suspected or charged with that killing in the book.

When Warner Brothers later made the Humphrey Bogart movie from it, the screenwriters had to call Raymond Chandler to ask him who murdered the chauffeur, and he said, “Dammit, I don’t know!” (>‿◠):v:

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I’m sorry you don’t have that kind of support/ability. :sadhug:

I will admit, I have said something like this before—partially because it’s a common piece of advice, and partially because there are people who do have that kind of support.

Personally, I’m half an half. While my family supports my writing, and have actually read some of what I write, they aren’t the best to rely on. My mom and dad are often too busy to read a whole novel, one of my sister’s isn’t a reader at all, my oldest sister is a reader but probably wouldn’t read my books, and my little sister isn’t a big reader and probably wouldn’t care. On top of that, I don’t have friends. xD Usually, my mom will read snippets whenever she has free time, but we don’t talk about my writing life. It’s an embarrassing feeling whenever I do talk about it. And my siblings have read snippets of my work as well, but only to make fun of it. Like, when my oldest sister got a hold of my Wattpad account, she saw my book Taste of Italy and started saying that it was erotica (which it isn’t) and would be like, “What’s it about?” and then make up a random plot to it, like someone licking another person or licking the streets of Italy. :rofl: She did this in the car, too, with our parents in there… the look my dad gave me is unforgettable especially when he thought it was all true. :woman_facepalming: Honestly, I’d rather not have them read my stuff.

This is why I try to be as descriptive as possible when giving advice, to try to include everyone. The advice works best for people who do have support from friends and family, who have people who aren’t just encouraging you to write but are genuinely interested in your work. Unfortunately, this isn’t the majority. I’ve heard many writers also talk about this, too, where support only goes halfway. They aren’t interested in what you write, they don’t care about it, but they are happy that you are happy with your hobby or career choice (since some will quit their jobs to pursue publishing).

So, if you are in the vast majority where you don’t have someone who can read your work, bounce ideas off of, talk about your stories, or don’t actually have any support whatsoever, the advice will focus on friends.

This is where I often explain that you can find people online, like you said, through Facebook writing groups or forums. You can also use social media, like YouTube, TikTok, Threads, Instagram, and others.

Or, you can try to see if there’s others around you in your area… not online. Like seeing if there’s anywhere that holds writing groups, write-ins, or other kinds of things that are in-person. It might be best found in libraries, but I know not everywhere has one, so there’s always seeing if there’s elsewhere that may have them. And if not, you can always post something online to ask if there are writers within your area or at least, within traveling distance.

I never have done it, but I’ve seen so many people have on social media. Like, I’ve recently seen people who post videos on YouTube who say they’re meeting an online friend for the first time for a writing retreat or to write at a random cafe in their area, etc. Honestly, if I had the money and wasn’t scared of being robbed/raped/murdered, I’d totally do this lol

I once was told that a character’s name (for a contemporary) should be changed because it didn’t sound realistic. While I do agree that a name should sound realistic in terms of ethnicity, etc., but I’d have to disagree and also found weird that they said that because there are many “unrealistic” names out there. First and last. Not everyone is named Alexandra, Jonathan, or Carlos. Not everyone has the last name Johnson, Cruz, or Williams. I’ve met a lot of people with weird names, or names that are pronounced or spelled differently than one of its variants. I even met a guy with the last name Poop. xD

It just seems silly to me that people associate names needing to be realistic, even though they’re just made up as anything else in this world. xD

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Have you seen the names that Nick Cannon gives to his kids? He needs to pay compensasion for that on top of child support, because imagine the emotional damage caused by having “Powerful Queen” on your birth certificate.

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Oh no :open_mouth: :flushed:

That must have been terribly awkward even though it wasn’t true :sweat_smile:

If only I could do that in Japan!

Japan is relatively safe when it comes to meeting people offline, but the thing is, English.

I could probably find writing groups who write stories in Japanese, but I don’t write stories in Japanese :sweat_smile: I get jealous of writing retreats :stuck_out_tongue: Idk if I’d be able to concentrate, but it sounds like fun.

Have you ever been to a writing retreat?


:melting_face:

Realistic???

How…I don’t understand how a name can be realistic or unrealistic. I mean, look at Elon Musk’s kids.

Look at Elon Musk.

I just noticed, if you put an “M” in front of Elon Musk, you get Melon Musk XD

Oh my gosh XD Is it pronounced the same or differently?

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Melon Musk sounds like a failed cologne.

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Omg XD It does!

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:rofl:

I’d die of embarrassment and couldn’t wait to change my name. :rofl: I’m pretty sure he’s the reason why some hospitals will deny certain names. hahaha

Super awkward. :rofl:

Ah, true. But I think it’d still be a cool experience either way, and who knows, maybe someone might write in English or might read in English or who might be interested to learn English by reading your works that are in English? :sweat_smile: Or you could still go and at least have someone who’s bookish to support you, even if they can’t read it. I’ve met some cool people online but only write smut or in a particular genre I don’t read in, but I think if I had the chance or ability, I’d definitely hang out and have a writing session. xD

I have not, sadly, but have always wanted to. I think that if I end up moving this year, I definitely need to find more writerly friends. If I could actually make friends, that is… xD

:rofl:

I mean, I’m sure some of these people are also part of the “what is a name for a bad boy?” :joy:

Thankfully, I didn’t have to ask. :sweat_smile: He pronounced it as poh-op.

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