Does this stanza suck as much as I think it does?

Okay so maybe not the whole stanza, just the first couple of lines… I’m just not sure if I’m just overthinking, but it just feels like it’s not flowing quite right. This here is the stanza:

We climb trees of cold steel,

Busted knees on concrete and tempered nerves of steel

Trees today are just an aesthetic appeal,

Paired with coffee and quotes on an Instagram reel.

I’m not sure if I like the repetition of “steel,” I was kind of going for the idea that kids playgrounds are all the same kind of metal climbing frame, cold, and kind of unimaginative… The concept of the poem is environmental destruction/ “we used to actually play outside” mantra. This particular stanza is really supposed to be about the fact that a lot of younger generations, we CAN’T play in the way our parents did because society isn’t really designed in a way that we can do the things our parents did. (Especially so in my case because my parents grew up in the Caribbean and I had to grow up in the UK.)

I also feel like the whole rhythm of the 2nd line just feels off? I’m not really confident when it comes to writing poetry, so an outside POV would be really helpful!

I outright refuse to think I’m good at poetry even as a “failed musician”, but I’ll take a crack at this.

We climb trees of cold steel:

Busted knees on concrete and tempered nerves can’t feel

That true wood has lost its aesthetic appeal:

Etched with coffee for quotes on an Instagram reel.

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