These two stories taking place in New Sollei, reflect each other in that both characters are walking down the school hallway in some way.
The Rat Girl
Every walk to the school door was a parade for Celeste Gilmore, the protagonist in everyone’s lives, acting as Wonder Woman with her long black hair in wavy ringlets down her shoulders, a bright smile that made boys blush, and curves that made eyes ogle.
(so long, I might cut it during editing. does it make people wonder? no. not yet.)
Eryn strutted down the school hall in fury to catch up with the stupid nerd in the plaid shirt.
(obviously, this one is edited and shorter. makes people wonder?)
There Lives a Beast in the Burning Heart
Argenton Woodman signed off his journal with his name and age—he was still sixteen as far as he knew—then closed his notebook to wait for midnight to wash away his day’s memories like the rain did the blood after a fight.
(this could also be shorter. I tend to write long hooks when I’m drafting. also, idk if anyone would wonder…much)
Lone Gold, Daring Purple
“We have decided, you shall be delayed one year.”
(you can see, I have edited this, so it’s short XD Many people have liked this hook.)
But sometimes, my hooks are longer if they are for stories inspired by literary fiction.
The Facade of Quad in Nimrod
In the country of Lwendolen lay the once grand city of Nimrod that was the birthplace of King Knimrod II, but only the deteriorating lip-gumming old folk remembered the truly grand days.
(this is long, but it’s edited. It starts out with vibes. hoping that people are at least curious about Nimrod to continue on. Could be edited again, perhaps.)