How is it Christmas Eve already?

Does anyone else feel like it’s not Christmas yet? Like we just got started with December yesterday? Only me? Mmmk.

How has your holidays been? And if you don’t celebrate the holidays, what’s been going on?

I’ve got a quite bit to unpack because I have a lot on my mind, so if you want to bypass all of that, you can skip the hidden detail thing.

But otherwise, this is what's going on with me:

I think for me, it doesn’t feel like Christmas just because this Christmas has sucked. For the most part anyway. If you don’t know, which I feel like I mention this way too many times, but if you don’t know… I live with my oldest sister in a very small house. She’s older than me by like five years (I’m 25, almost 26, by the way). And well, she’s going through her very first breakup. There’s a huge history here, but in short:

When she was in her early 20s, she moved out of my parents’ house and in with her best friend’s family. Her best friend has two other siblings—a brother and sister—and while my sister was living with them, she gained feelings for the brother after a long period of time. Now, the problem is that they’re nine years apart, so he was still a teen. :grimacing: She ended up moving out to come back with us after she was like 25-26ish and that relationship grew into a long-distanced one. But he liked her, she liked him, and it wasn’t anything crazy like they’ve never French kissed or anything. Most of their relationship has been pure innocence. Flash forward quite a few years to him being an adult (he’s turning 22-23, I can’t remember) and there were parts of their lives where they had their future planned. She would move out with him, they’d get married, etc. But there were multiple red flags going on like how she was still a secret to his family (he didn’t want them to know because she’s known them for half of her life, and she also wasn’t really ready to share to our parents, but we all knew she had feelings for him, and even our dad gave her blessings for a wedding), and how he didn’t always text her or didn’t make the effort to call her. She does, however, have toxic traits like how she would hack into his socials or tell him he couldn’t be friends with girls, but through this, she’d catch him in a lie. He’d do things like tell her he was going to bed, but then be up for an extra two hours texting another girl. He’d also say things like how he didn’t like to text and instead, enjoyed calling more, but he’d text other girls with no problem for no limited time.

Anyway, any time we visited them or they visited us, he never made an effort and she felt him pulling away but ignored it. And it wasn’t until last week when he said that he wanted to break up, even though they weren’t actually dating because they’ve never been on an actual first date since they’ve never been exclusive. Beside the point, there was another girl he recently met because of his new job and his parents know her parents and they like them and her (they don’t like our parents; they’re very hypocritical—that’s a whole other can of worms), and my sister got jealous and kept asking him if he had feelings for her which he constantly tore down. For months. It wasn’t until last week when he decided to say, “We’re over.” My sister went into a huge depression (which she’s still in, by the way) and went nuts. There’s a bunch of other drama that went down where it nearly ruined her relationship with his family.

Anyway, because of all this drama and this breakup, we haven’t really done anything “Christmassy” because she’s been a complete train-wreck. She’s now finally trying to do stuff and to not cry and be happy, but it’s not working. It’s gotten so bad that she’s going to go into therapy next week to talk to a counselor about her depression and anxiety and all this drama. And what’s worse is that the ex just went on his first date with that same girl he said he didn’t like. She even asked him if he liked her, and he said no, and then she said would he start dating, and he said he needed space. Uh-huh. Sure. For like, what? Ten minutes? He’s now texting this new girl every moment of the day (because she hacked into his socials earlier today, which she did a big step and deleted it all from her phone and told him to redo them so she couldn’t anymore—she also had some of his log-ins just because he could never remember his passwords), so that right there tells you he just didn’t care anymore. And he even said that he’s felt like this (like he wasn’t in love anymore) for months but never could tell her because he wasn’t brave enough. And he breaks up with her not only before Christmas, but also two weeks away from his birthday where she was going to go see him for New Years (his birthday, nearly) and she bought him and his family gifts (which she sent off today) and was going to do a carriage ride which cost her 200 dollars because it was for the entire family. But because of all the drama that happened (not only him breaking up with her, but another thing because of her toxic jealousy side), they didn’t want her to come up to see him. So now that carriage ride (which is not refundable) was basically a waste of money on her end. They’re still doing it, from what I heard, and the new girl is taking my sister’s spot on the ride. It makes me angry.

Like, why do people do this? Breakup at the worst possible moments? He either could’ve waited until after January or just said something months and months ago. UGH.

But I’m trying to be there for her as best as possible without as much judgment as I can muster (which is painfully hard because I’ve never liked him and constantly told her to breakup with him for years because she deserved better, and plus, he’s still so young and still finding himself—I mean, my sister’s doing the same at nearly thirty-one, but the majority of guys are stupid and don’t know what they want until after their 20s) but it’s been mentally exhausting to deal with it all. And it doesn’t help that she doesn’t like taking my advice simply because I’ve never had a relationship before. Like bruh, you don’t need the experience to have good advice. :roll_eyes:

But like, out of this whole month, we’ve watched one Christmas movie, two episodes of the new Santa Clause show, made graham cracker houses (gingerbread houses out of graham crackers), and played one round of Battle Ship. Any time I bring up movies, shows, or games, she doesn’t feel like doing anything but laying and sulking. And I’ve tried to force her so she can get distracted, but nothing works. So… it’s been rough. And now it’s nearly Christmas and I don’t know how because it doesn’t feel like it for the sole purpose of not having that “Christmas spirit.”

My other older sister who lives far away told me to just watch stuff by myself, but it’s not the same. It’s my first Christmas without my parents here, and my little teen sister is a complete grandma and wants to go to bed right after dinner at 7pm or if it’s not that, she wants to do her own thing even though she gets two weeks off of school and the majority of that time, she’s home alone because the older siblings here got work.

Honestly, all I want to do now is cry because the holidays are supposed to be family time and gives you all these warm and fuzzy feelings. But not this year apparently.

The only good things that’s good for now is that I got five days off work because of the storm (originally, I would just get the 24th–26th off, but we closed on Thursday and Friday due to how cold it is), I finished my eighteenth book of the year, and I finished the second draft of my novel and started working on the third draft.

Anyway… sorry for this massive post (as usual).


I’m so sorry you’ve had such a rotten Christmas and all that drama is going on right now in your life. I sort of know how you feel. Obviously our circumstances are very different, but I don’t feel like it’s really Christmas either. Honestly, I haven’t for the past four or five years. Christmas just doesn’t hit the same for me anymore, it seems.

I don’t know exactly what changed, but I suspect it has to do with the fact that my family and I have been moving a lot in the past few years (3 times in 4 years) and it’s been extremely stressful. We haven’t really had the money or energy to do anything to celebrate the past few Christmas seasons. Even now, we are still settling into a new house after moving again, and even though we are closer to extended family now so we can spend the holidays with them and reconnect, it just doesn’t feel like Christmas to me. We still can’t do much financially, we are all still very tired and overworked from moving, and I think a big part of it is just that Christmas doesn’t hold the same magic now that I’m an adult as it did when I was a kid. Which is probably the most depressing of all. A part of me hopes that it’s not permanent and it’s just been a fluke the past few years because of all that moving. But a part of me is also afraid that I’ll never really have another Christmas that feels like Christmas. Like I outgrew it. Life is just too stressful now for me to be able to indulge in that nostalgia and magic anymore… It’s sad.

So I can relate in a way to how you feel. But I hope I’m wrong and both of us will have better Holiday seasons in our future. For what it’s worth, I wish you a Merry Christmas and hope things get better for you and your sister soon. You never know, maybe you’ll still be able to create some positive memories and have some fun on Christmas day. Even if your sister is making it difficult for you to have Christmas spirit, I’m sure it means a lot to her that you are trying and there to support her emotionally right now when she’s going through such a difficult time in her life. Hopefully you can bond and make this Christmas meaningful for each other just by being there for each other.


Yeah, we wrapped the presents yesterday and put up the tree maybe a week ago. Me and the family looked at the date today and went “huh that happened” :joy:


I have been crocheting a lot lately, in order to make a good present for my mom.


aw :frowning_face: sorry your sister got broken up with. Christmas season is a shitty time for that to happen. And sorry its having a bad effect on your Christmas too.

i know what you mean about it still feeling like the start of December. yesterday i was packing up thinking “there’s no way it’s been a month already”. time don’t real.

it’s okay, just remember modern christmas is a disgustingly overcapitlized season and “holiday season :heart::heart:” mentality is a manipulation used by coporations to guilt you into buying more stuff :smiling_face: the importance of the season is falsified. it’s okay to feel sad or distant on Christmas, things will get better and honestly, who’s going to stop you if you decide to do something like leave your tree up and watch christmas movies all january instead of december?


First off, I’m really sorry your Christmas season’s been really cruddy, lots of drama can make it difficult to enjoy these times.

Mine’s been alright, we put up the tree like three weeks ago and bought some nice Christmas-themed candles for the house, that’s about it there. For me, these days are to enjoy the little break I have between classes (and yes, they’ve gone by fast! Did a lot of things). We start again on Jan 4.

Me and my sister bought gifts for our parents just two days ago, they’re under the tree now. While there are two presents under the tree for us, honestly we got most our gifts ahead of time :joy:

My bf and I exchanged our gifts about a week ago, went on a date before he left town to be with his family for Christmas. Pretty happy with my gift!


It doesn’t feel like Christmas eve here either, although it finally feels like winter. I’m in Florida, and all the water in our birdbath is frozen today. It’s cold enough to snow here but there’s zero chance of precipitation, so no snow job for us. /sob

Try to have a merry Christmas anyway! (੭ˊᵕˋ)੭‧˚₊̥✧


I’m having a Churronoche party by myself with KFC, alcohol and Arrested Development. And tomorrow we are having Christmas Dinner.


Thank you. :sadhug:

And oof, I know how that feels. Moving is stressful, even when it can be exciting. I grew up moving across the country about once or three times a year, or more, depending. There were places we stayed in for a month, a few months, or up to a year or a little bit over, but then we’d move again after those time frames. And it was always stressful. Where I live now is actually, and surprisingly, the longest I’ve personally ever been at: three years, going on four. But we want to move again. :sweat_smile:

Oh yeah, I can definitely see that being a good reason, probably even how I feel as well every so often. Same as birthdays and Halloween.

Like, as a kid, I grew up watching holiday movies in class at school with pizza parties and pajama days, then get two weeks off from school. And now, I don’t have that. Sure, I finally get to work at a place where I don’t have to work on Christmas (and get three days off for) but it’s nothing like two weeks. And holiday movies in class hits a lot different than when you’re at home lol. And sure, some of my staff brings goodies every once in a while to share with everyone, but pizza and pajama parties were so much fun and I looked forward to doing those things.

Decorating the house for Christmas in early December was always fun and exciting, and now it’s become stressful because things break and then you have to see if you have the money to buy that same thing again, or you can’t find a place to store any of the decorations or whatnot, etc.

I also grew up having my parents give us like 50 or so dollars for us to buy gifts at the store for each other, and now that I have adult money, shopping for anyone is overwhelming because things they want is either not available, too expensive, or not able to ship on time (if buying online). I never know what to buy anyone, honestly, besides the same silly things. My family isn’t the type to be like “Here’s 50 dollars. Spend it how you wish.” You always have to open something. Like trust me, I’ve tried telling my parents this every year for my birthday—I’m okay not getting stuff, I just want cash so I can pay a bill. xD

And there was always something so magical about my mom acting like Santa came. She always left notes on our biggest Christmas gifts with Santa’s signature and it felt like there was so much magic to it, you know? I mean, it was always a tradition of mine to try to sleep near the tree—whether on the floor or on the sofa—just to fall asleep to the beautiful scenery. It was magical to me when I was younger, and now—continuing that tradition—it hits different. Like, there is still some magic to it, but it feels emptier… if that makes any sense?

Thank you, and I also hope you have a merry Christmas yourself. :sadhug: :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:


I’ve actually had years in the past where my parents would buy our Christmas tree on Christmas Eve (like I remember one time, it was like 8pm and we got one of the last real trees from Home Depot on Christmas Eve and they actually gave it to us for free—which originally was like a 30-50 dollar tree) or buying presents on Christmas Eve. Part of this was timing and financial excuses, though. :sweat_smile:

Heck, we did it for Halloween like two years ago where we decorated everything (inside and out) on the evening of Halloween. :rofl:

Oooh. What are you making?

I’ve been wanting to start crocheting but I feel like I’d suck at it. Haha

Thank you. :sadhug: And yeah, waiting until Christmas/New Years is super sucky.

:sweat_smile: True that, haha.

Thank you. :sadhug:

That’s nice, though. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

Oof. Too soon. :upside_down_face:

Haha, I tried to do that this year (buying ahead of time) because for the past few years, I ended up waiting until the very last moment. But I bought all of my gifts online (thanks to living in the middle of nowhere with only Walmart as my only main store) so I needed to do it in case they came super late or whatnot. The only thing I recently did in terms of gifts was the stocking stuffers. I bought them this past week on Tuesday because I had just gotten paid and decided to just rush to Walmart to buy a couple silly do-dads. And then I put them in a few days ago.

Awh, that’s cool! :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

What did you get?

I agree with you on that, sort of lol. That storm on Thursday and Friday was crazy, and we got a little bit of snow but it all—for the most part, anyway—cleared up today. But it is a lot colder than last year. I live in Kansas, so our highs these days are between the 30s to 50s, but last year at this same exact time, we were in the 70s throughout most of the month. It didn’t actually start getting colder until late January where it would often snow or rain, which then kept up until May.

DUUUDE. That’s crazy!! I also can’t believe how nuts that storm was, though. I feel bad for people further up north. :rofl: But like, on Wednesday—just before the storm—it was so cold that all the trees frosted over. There wasn’t any snow yet, but it looked like it had.

It was really pretty. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

And yeah, same. I wish it would snow just because it’s cold enough for it to snow (and also because I’d like to have at least one year where it’s a white Christmas) but on the same token, I’m glad it hasn’t because I’d be too scared to drive. xD

And thank you. :sadhug: You, too. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

Sounds like a good night. :sweat_smile:

What’s your dinner for Christmas?


Yeaaah, way too soon :sob: feels odd starting classes before Three Kings Day (Jan. 6), but I’ll make the best of this break ^.^

From bf? It was a Switch Lite + 3 games! Still shocks me how much he was willing to spend–

As for gifts from my parents, got a cute cat hoodie a few days ago, and today we’ll be opening the rest :smiling_face:


It got cold for Christmas. Like, let your pipes drip cold. We are used to going to family gatherings in summer weight dresses. I kept my younger toe in footies all day yesterday, and may do similar today.


A stress ball. She needs it.


That’s the disappointing part :joy_cat: steak, bacon, ham and assorted vegetable dishes.


You’re going to hate me but I had this


Christmas is the worst time of the year :angry: I wasn’t gonna do xmas because of my whole communist anarchy thing.

But my coworker invited me to his xmas party this evening and I feel obliged because it’s also his b’day. My ex, who I have unfinished business with, will be attendance. So will my big time crush, who I’ve been trying to get an opportunity to sit down and talk to. Also the guy supervising my research project will be there. And the local MP, who I’ve been tryna get in good graces with. Oh did I mention I previously hooked up with the coworker a few times (before we were coworkers obviously)? His fiancé will be there too. Not awkward at all. Kill me now.


You’re already short-circuited and recycled in my mind :hugs:

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Oh, that’s so cool! c:

Awh, how cute! :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

Yeah, especially with that nasty storm crossing around North America lol. We always let our faucets drip once it hits below 20 degrees because our house is old (not too old, I think it was built in the 70s) and our pipes freeze easily. But we also have this hole under our house (you can access the pipes under there) and we have a heater running down there, but it can still freeze lol. Good thing was our water worked for the most part during that horrid storm. The kitchen sink didn’t get cold water, just hot water.


Not gonna lie, need one too. That’s cool, though! Stress balls are great lol

I don’t see that as disappointing! :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: I also had steak, with a side of a baked potato, shrimp, baked squash, and bread. I was, however, disappointed with my steak though. It didn’t turn out as great—I bought cheap meat but I also think it went bad in the fridge which sucks because I had only had it in there for like two days and it wasn’t even past the expiration date. :upside_down_face: It also didn’t have as much flavoring as I had hoped, either.

Wait… what is that? :sweat_smile: I can tell it’s ham and… raisins? Olives? Something else?.. inside a bread (which bruh, that bread looks soooo good).

Awh, I’m sorry. :sadhug:

Though honestly, I feel as though that party belongs on a TV show or movie because that scenario is insane… :sweat_smile:


Pan de Jamon, the traditional food of a Venezuelan Chistmas. The flavor comes from the olives, not the ham.


Lmao I’m convinced I’m living in a soap opera for the viewing pleasure of a cruel god :laughing:

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This was both more and less dramatic as it could’ve been.

My ex was quiet but civil with me. My crush was so boring, all he wanted to do was talk politics and the news. No dates in the pipeline with him whew :sweat_smile: My coworker and his fiancé were lovely. They let me steal a book from their library. My research supervisor was a no show. The local MP was very cool.

I did offer my escort services as a joke to someone — it turned out to be another MP :grimacing: I had no idea! He laughed it off tho. Thank eff for wine. I just played with the cats in the back room from then on. I did eventually hit it off with some guy I took to be an assistant to the new MP. We left early. This morning the “assistant” told me he’s a Councillor himself! Thankfully he’s not my constituency. I’m like one step away from a political sex scandal :sob:

One good thing came out of it tho. I know where Kate Bush lives :smirk: ish

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