“Partner” is the general term I’m using to describe any kind of person you are in a committed relationship with that is not always platonic, but mostly romantic. You know, someone you’re (or were) in a loving relationship with. I’m talking about any kind of partner that is more than friends.
So the question.
What are the things that your partner has done that made you feel like the cupid has just pierced you with a heart arrow?
You know, those moments where you’re like or you feel or or like you want to hug them until they tell you to stop, or that make you giggle or make you feel giddy or make you feel like you’re the most special person ever or make you like that person even more.
Specifically,
I’m asking for moments that might not always be romantic. Not giving flowers or candy or holding your hand or kissing your cheek or saying “I love you”. I’m asking about other moments as much as you’d like to disclose.
An example might be washing the dishes without being asked. Or maybe if the person smiles or if they tell you your outfit looks good today. Or maybe they tell you a really, really silly joke that they know you’ll laugh at. Might not be a surprise dinner at a fine restaurant, but it makes you feel
Honestly, stupid stuff like if he can see I’m exhausted or in pain (chronic condition) and I get up to do something, he’ll turn me around and tell me to rest and he’ll do it. (not in an abusive way, in a I can see you’re done in let me take charge way)
He’ll let me lie in and offer to take charge of the kid and feed the cats in the morning.
One that really does make my heart melt is my husband isn’t a reader, so he’s never read my stuff, but he’ll help me out with plots or just listen to me rant sometimes about my writing. Or sometimes he’ll sit down and read snippets if I need advice. thats a big thing for him to do.
I woke up one morning and he’d bought me the new Far Cry game without me knowing, downloaded it onto the Xbox and told me he was taking our son out for a few hours so I could play it.
(who said romance was dead LMAO mine are so ordinary)
My husband and I had celebrated 23 years of marriage a few days ago.
He has no interest at all in figure skating, but on Friday I was basically heartbroken about my absolute favorite finishing in 4th place after a lead in the short program, and likely giving away his chance at Olympics (unfairly! but I digress), so anyway…
on Saturday I was watching ice dance, still rolled up in the blanket and trying to get over it, and my husband returned with 2 cheesecakes. He said, judging by amount of angst and unhappiness, one wouldn’t be enough.
I told him, it depends on how many quads Trusova (my favorite in the upcoming woman’s competitions) lands.
And he said, at least we are ready for anything now.
I guess, my point is, even if you don’t share hobbies and passions, being sensitive to them is a huge every day win.
I’m the hardheaded type that doesn’t see it, or accepts it and does not dwell.
Like he got me flowers because I’d not got them before, and then after that, told him to quit buying them because I didn’t care for flowers. Now we get them so that the kids know that dad gets mom flowers, and we put them where the kids can look at them.
But the part that was so damned hard to go through was practically abandoning my family to care for my mother at the end of her life.
Spouse went literally beyond what he could bear: no wife at home, no extra finances, kids constantly needing attention because they missed us, a fully distressed wife. He reached his breaking point where he didn’t feel like he could do it anymore, and still held it together for the last few weeks of mom’s life.
That level of commitment made me want to burn romance novels for a good year fo not being real enough.
But he generally does things around the house, stops us from minor fights to just hug me, things that you expect or an affectionate man.
When they notice little things about me that I don’t even notice about myself.
I feel like I’ve learned a lot about myself just through things that they’ve observed, things that I never could’ve noticed on my own. Like the way that I walk, the way I fidget with my hands when I talk, the way I pronounce certain words. It’s so shocking to me that little things I don’t even think about are endearing to them, and remind them of me.
They remember all of my preferences, no matter how mundane or specific. Even if I casually mention that I like or dislike something, they remember it and use it to buy me gifts, skip certain songs on the radio, send me articles talking about very niche topics that I’m interested in.
I feel like they know me better than I know myself— sometimes they’ll show me something and notice something like, “I know this is your favorite color, but not your favorite shade of it”. It’s always the most simple things that make me feel the most loved and understood.
My ex used to do this excited little head/shoulder bob every time he started talking to me about his favorite video game or something else he was passionate about. It was just so adorable!
When we drove along the parkway after dark in the fog, he’d be more spooked than I was.
He got along super well with my brother. They would literally sit there and nerd out together and I felt like the 3rd wheel sometimes I was just really happy he got along so well with my family.
He was completely comfortable with letting me take the relationship as slow as I wanted to. He was also just so polite to me and understanding of my anxieties and where they came from.
He always listened actively. We could sit and talk about each others’ emotional stuff or grievances with one another and still be completely calm and friendly to one another afterward and move forward.
I really enjoyed looking at his eyes, as cliche as that is, but I guess that’s more romantic than what you’re asking for ahaha.
Honestly, our whole relationship was just super chill and pleasant and kind. It made it perfect. But life decided to take us down different paths. Still will reminisce about it every time I drive on the parkway or pass his neighborhood ahaha.
When we were planning our wedding we had to debate whether to do a Star Wars theme or Lord of the Rings. We settled on Star Wars and when I joked that we should buy each other lightsabers she said yes without a second thought.
“Trying out some role play” always involves a character sheet and a 20 sided die
She really understands when I say things like “I’m annoyed because this boss fight sucks”
She wants to renovate our basement to make a dedicated VR room down there
During my last semester, I was really busy Stage Managing a show. I was overwhelmed, failing classes. I’d be getting home around 9-11pm at night when I had to be up at 7 the next morning.
Every day he picked me up. Everyday he would stay on the phone with me as I walked to the parking lot to make sure I was safe. Every day he would let me sleep an extra 15 minutes and get our lunches made and packed for the day.
We didn’t see much of each other throughout the day, but he always made a point to have lunch with me no matter what. He would have dinner ready for me when I got home, or pick up something to make sure I ate before bed.
He would help me with my math homework any time I asked. He even still opens every door for me, helps me out of the car, carries the bags, and checks on me throughout the day.
We don’t go on dates or spend much time together because of how busy we are with school and work. However I’ve never doubted that he loved me because of small things like this.
Now that is love and commitment. Right there. That’s what it looks like.
Shows they are making effort to connect with you. That you matter to them that much. Really the little things make all the difference, don’t they?
That’s great you have good memories of a past relationship. Shows that not all relationships that are good are permanent and not all relationships that ended were bad.
Awesome XD You two sound really compatible!
Awwwww He really, really cares about you it seems Like @J.L.O talked about, it’s the commitment that shows here. The willingness to commit.
It’s what makes the majority of romances not really romance. They are the first bloom of love, where you have no idea what life has in store for you, and you’re facing an ending that’s assumed to be happy.
That is the real attraction of such things, where you’re getting to see a world from a more innocent view (no matter how onry the characters). It’s all icing, no cake, forget a full meal.
A few years removed, and I can handle romance writing more objectively.
or you feel 
or 
or like you want to hug them until they tell you to stop, or that make you giggle or make you feel giddy or make you feel like you’re the most special person ever or make you like that person even more.
He really, really cares about you it seems 
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