Just set some perimeters here!! Hound can control water by moving her fingers. She can use this power to shoot water blades that splash upon hit or surf at the surface. The water blade doesn’t do as much damage compared to the saw or gun she uses, but it leaves the opponent wet. The water blades can last for up to 5 seconds before being shot. Each cast of hydromancy consumes 1 vial.
Okay, so this one ended up getting nerfed hard. I only really ended up keeping the “freezing opponent” part, but if you don’t like it I can use the offensive part instead. Hound can freeze the water left behind by her hydromancy attack to freeze her opponent for 5 seconds wherever her opponent is wet. Once the freezing wears off, that particular area can’t be frozen again. Hound must wait at least 30 seconds between cryokinesis attacks.
I set some limits here, too, and didn’t limit it much. Tragic that Hound won’t use it much bc she thinks it’s gross though By using her saliva, Hound can heal external wounds on her body, although she doesn’t like to use this ability because it disgusts her. It takes up to 30 seconds to close a wound fully—but it won’t get rid of the pain. This ability only applies to flesh wounds. After healing a wound, Hound will be fatigued for 10 seconds. This ability can be used as many times as she likes, provided she waits at least a minute after a wound is fully healed before closing another. Fatigue will increase with each healing.
A dark water-based magic where Hound can generate a blade made of her solidified blood and shoot it towards her opponent. This attack deals the most damage compared to the other offensive moves that she can do, but due to unhealthy reasons, she can only use this ability once per battle. Hound will be extremely fatigued for 15 seconds after using this ability.
If you have any issues with these changes, just let me know and I’ll see what I can work out. Otherwise, Hound’s all ready to be resubmitted to the Colosseum!!
I did know this, it’s supposed to point out a weird idiosyncrasy Sebastian has, though I might have done it better.
Yea, I write in an odd way, but your advice helps my writing be more accessible.
ahem
I thought about that, but I personally hate brackets in story-telling, so I’ll work on that.
I’m really glad you liked it! Thanks for your advice as well! I haven’t written anything like that in a while so it’s nice to get another pair of eyes to point out what I need to work on.
Glad you got your wacky back! but yes Palatine got thrown in the Necromancer’s Lair for inactivity and unless people really want a Palatine I don’t think I’ll be making another one, since we have the discord server anyway.
I mean, I just throw my opinion on a piece of paper and that’s not exactly professional or thourough. What I despise someone else may love and at this point almost everything is valid/art so idk. In theory anyone could do anything and it’d be almost always a valid piece of writing so idk if steering people in a certain direction is always so neccesary. That aside, thank you.
I don’t have any problem with what Seb did. The action of laying/enjoying the moonlight is totally fine idc. It’s the fact that basking (as far as I can see) is often used for warm stuff and moonlight isn’t exactly warm so I would pick a different verb there. The thing is, I’m not natively English so maybe it’s not weird to use that verb in that context. If it’s not weird to read for a natively English person in that specific context or if you don’t care it’s fine.
I mean what else you want me to call it?
I suppose he could be just very good at pretending.
In my experience most readers don’t really make the difference, especially not in fiction. Dashes are the only ones that are distinctively known for reflecting thoughts from a character’s pov, but the other two are often used interchangeably so I don’t think it would cause too much trouble if you would use one for the other.
It’s not really my place I guess but ‘basking’ in the moonlight’ is actually used quite a bit so it’s not that weird of a phrase. I’ve heard it several times before at least.
I think its second definition uses ‘basking’ in reference to generally reveling in something/anything pleasant as opposed to just the warmth of something
If you go to the “cakeday” tab under the hamburger icon across the header, you can see a list of all the today/tomorrow/this month anniversaries and birthdays.
By using her saliva, Hound can heal external wounds on her body, although she doesn’t like to use this ability because it disgusts her. It takes up to 30 seconds to close a wound fully—but it won’t get rid of the pain. This ability only applies to flesh wounds. After healing a wound, Hound will be fatigued for 10 seconds. This ability can be used as many times as she likes, provided she waits at least a minute after a wound is fully healed before closing another. Fatigue will increase with each healing.
