Time to get some hand writing sprints going then when I break, start reading The Warrior Heir, just to see if I am still capable of reading physical books.
I think I shall read Magnus Chase before bedtime.
Get in the habit of reading before bed to help me sleep better.
Arcane Proposal is getting good!
See you later!
I am almost done with page fifteen of my short story Arcane Proposal.
I have five more pages to go for the short story.
So, I am going to stop here and take a breather before I start something else to do.
I am going to finish up a bit more of the story later on today.
Now, I just want to do some bit of relaxing and some reading too.
Oh, interesting! Is the story focused more on Catalina/Johann or is about their heir’s life?
More so Catalina and Johann then a little bit of focus on their child.
It’s focusing on how two people who don’t even know each, nor like each other, nor see each other in a romantic light are put together in some business-like arranged marriage in order to produce a powerful heir and overall bloodline.
I am done with Arcane Proposal and I may plan on typing the story on my computer when I get the chance to.
Aw, man, that was so flipping good!
I realized I’ve been stuck with my fantasy story because the last two chapters I wrote kind of slow things down too much? I kept trying to think of a way to speed it up with those chapters because there is some interesting dialogue/character development in them but since I’m still in the first third of my book, it feels like it’s dragging.
I hate to do it but I’m going to have to axe those chapters. I’ll save them for somewhere else maybe, but for now, chopping block! I haven’t been writing as much as I used to. Still playing Zelda. It’s addictive. Halp! 
ha, finished edit #1
In my AU Tower of God fanfic, everyone is living different lives than in the actual webcomic and personalities that are a tiny bit altered. The character’s I’ve chosen from Tower of God are the characters I want to showcase the most and they will be along side my original characters.
In terms of story/plot, the world/planet is Alagossia version 2 and the name of the planet is called Gnorilia.
Another thing, the things found on Alagossia and even earth will be on Gnorilia, but WAY more magical and bit more advanced in technology (think the technology currently on earth, but a bit more sleeker, modern, advanced, and works great with or without magical powers).
Looking forward to staring this fanfiction after many decades since my last fanfic.
I think the last fanfic I wrote was when I was a Hetalian (don’t ask, please) and when the show was so popular.
I threw out two chapters and very painfully wrote 350 words. That’s enough for me today. Better than 0 words. 
In other news, I got my first complaint on a fanfic I wrote. The gist of it was, “I liked it until you used the word ‘mansplain.’” 
Well, mansplain tends to trigger people on both sides of the word. Not surprising.
Right? Funny thing is the fic itself is meant to be a romantic comedy so the word wasn’t really meant to be taken that serious, buuuut there’s always those types I guess. 
I need to redo The Ghost of the God Slayers because I have a fanfic idea for Tower of God that deserves to be handwritten.
TGGS will go back to being original fiction.
So, I need seriously plot and plan this novel thoroughly by plot, chapter, and characters to keep me going and stick with me for a good while.
I will eventually return to Arcane Proposal some soon-ish day.
I now got two stories strongly focus on which is my AU ToG fanfiction and TGGS and my main focus.
Nothing else to add.
Well, think of it this way: its a highly specific “victimization” word, as in it deacribes the degrdatuon of a person in 1 word that could take a lifetime to formulate, otherwise.
To someone who is geniuinely victimized in such a manner–if they are the type to weild it like a tool, in order to be heard, joking about it woudd be trivializing, and they will get aggressive about it if its their hill to die on.
Unfortunately, since its now a pop word, its also used by people who are clueless and need explanations–just because a guy is saying something they ought to heed. This tyor is doubly-annoying because thwy will attack you for misuse when they abuse it the most and cause the 3rd: thise who are told they are Manslaining when they are not.
Frankly, to mee, its about as useless as any other “baiting word” because it is so popularly misused, that it might as well be used as a joke. I’d keep it–let thrm be ticked.
But its not sensitive.
But think about it. If I was a dude, this post would be Mansplaining instead of me systematically laying out my thoughts ao as to not cause confusion. Yeah, you should get 90% of what I wrote without me writing it, but its always that 10% that causes fights. Lol
I was going to write a scene where Pinti and her father were going to finally see eye to eye, hug it out, make up, and be happy.
But it didn’t turn out that way even though I wanted it to. Pinti’s father was obviously upset at the decline of his magick, he was panicking, and he says he’s been crying about it and unable to sleep. While Pinti sees that, she also wants to know if it is true that he only chose her to be leader because she has working magick, and not because she’s worthy as a leader.
She presses him for an answer and he’s like “What do you want me to do? Not heal the clan? There’s no one else that can heal the clan! Except you. But you are a worthy leader. Don’t get that wrong.”
Pinti hears this as “I only chose you because you have magick. You are only worthy because of your magick.” And it hurts her. And she wants her father to admit that he chose her to be leader because of her magick. But he won’t and all he does is talk about himself.
So, they don’t see eye to eye, but both also then realize that there’s no point in fighting when there are more important things to deal with. Pinti’s thoughts go to Tendri, her little sister who just returned home after being rescued from a rival clan. Pinti is worried about her sister’s recovery. I think her father’s thoughts are more like “I shouldn’t be fighting with my daughter. We need to be unified to get through this change.” Something big has changed in the clan.
The two of them hug, so, it’s like, they make up and accepting that there’s some ugly thing between them.
Pinti feels so upset afterwards she runs into the forest to cry. She misses the days with her father when things were not ugly between them.
I decided to keep this like this because in reality, just because you are family, doesn’t mean you’ll always see eye to eye especially as you get older. It happens. But you gotta move on.
So Pinti does and then is able to give a leader speech while showing her magick to the clan and they cheer for her. It’s this moment that Pinti finally gets into her leader mode. All this time she was a leader, she was struggling and unable to rest. But here she finally feels like she’s got control.
I think I’m showing her growth nicely. It’s a different kind of story beginning I’m doing where the story starts with her struggling to keep up with life as a leader, being unsure, confused, and exhausted, taking each day as it comes. It’s after her sister returns home that she finally starts to figure it out.
I’m hoping it’s believable that she was struggling because she had to suddenly be a leader and lead her clan to war for a month. After the war ends, that’s when she’s like, “okay, what kind of leader can I be?” Like she finally gets a breather?
In the young part of it, its hard. The older part of seing eye-to-eye depends on how much of yourself you give to the other’s opinions. Parents have to come off the pedestal, be humans, your eqaul…and then one day, they are dependant on you.
But until she realizes that no one is ready to lead when first given leadership, she’s looking for an acceptance that ahouldnt be there.
Its like having kids. The ones with experience aren’t raising kids–they are grandparents. And if you overstep your boundaries as a grandparent, the adults children will lash out at you, “you had your chance to raise kids, back off”. If you want a study in dynamics on things like this, you ask your parents how much their own parents and i laws belped and hindered when they were younger parents.
That must be a hard shift to make. Do you think about this sometimes as a parent that one day it’ll be this way? Do you find it hard to swallow or not so much because it’s a natural progression of things?
It’s a complicated thing for her because she’s the only one with working magick, only the leader is allowed to use the magick for healing, and so from her father’s perspective, he needed her to become leader to help the clan. If his magick wasn’t dying, that wouldn’t have happened.
But to Pinti it feels like she was only worthy to him because of her magick. He didn’t choose her for any other reason. In some ways she’s right, but he didn’t have a choice.
I think unconsciously Pinti is avoiding the truth that she must bear the burden of being the healer for the entire clan whether she likes it or not. She wants to blame someone for this responsibility that was given to her before she was even ready.
Its a terrifying thing. I don’t fear death that much, but the process of dying isn’t cool. You sre lucky if you keep yourself fit enought to die in your sleep. The gradual warnings that you are in a slow boil towards death leave you complacent, but one day, you can’t lift what you used to, you fall more, your breath gets short, you can’t stay warm, things hurt, recovery takes forever, you cant see like you used to, you can’t taste things the same way, your joints wear out, you choose between surgery and mobility, you’ve buried all your contemporaries, your kids have their own lives, youre stuck with making decisions about self-care and robbing time from the future generation (grandkids sacrificing for grandparents), you’re alone…
You’re alone, alone in your head, alone on the streets, the streets aren’t what they once were, (etiher senility or progress has revamped them), you aren’t the equal of strangers anymore (self-defense is a huge issue), cooking is a hassle, can’t afford too much food anyway, technology has left you behind…
It’s very easy to become negative, in the face of this. The scariest thing is that people who retire to enjoy their old age die within months of retirement, lovers die within months of each other. We aren’t built for idleness or lonliness.
I can’t be productive in writing till my cycle ends or two days after my period is over.
If that doesn’t make me a true writer in some people’s eyes, then you can go to hell with your logic.
Your girl ain’t here for it.
That self-realization would make the whole story, when it is time.
I saw that with my grandparents and their resistance of help because they think they are still young enough or able enough to carry heavy groceries or get up from the ground on their own.
They have to rely on their adult children. They don’t always want to.