90k in 2 months?
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No way am I writing 90k in 2 months @J.L.O
Lol
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I’m veering towards 4 or 5.
Yay.
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Should I just write one of each chapter?
a trained neurosurgeon friend DJ, David, a man who discovers that he can time travel and fix things in his life.
Is it about DJ or David, i.e. two characters or one? What does friend have to do with this? If he discovered time travel, how are Clockers related to him?
But what he doesn’t realize is that when he starts to fix things in alternate timelines, things start to change and mess up in their own way. So, when he decides that he’s had enough of his brother, Vicente, he decides to go back in time and try and distract his parents from doing the deed.
That’s an interesting idea for sort of victimless murder.
But he ends up doing it wrong, and gets stuck in the 1960s, a few years before he is born. He wants to go back home again, but he ends up meeting some people and doesn’t want to go back. But he has to go back when he fixes his powers to ensure that the future can operate properly.
Okay, this is a nice internal conflict. How does future not operate properly? It seemed to be okay w/o his elder brother.
So, the Clockers (the people who are in charge of Time Travel) track him down to the 1960s and try to take him out with darts and bring him forward but David is having none of it.
Do you even need this part? The paragraph before already has a strong conflict you can build up and up, plus it contradicts David being an inventor of the time travel.
Or are you doing multiple time paradoxes and clockers are from far out future and David is like their own hero?
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David IS A DJ, DJ is not a person lol. This is a typo, lol. I meant trained neurosurgeon TURNED DJ. I dunno how autocorrect managed to do this on me, lol. There is no DJ, just David.
Yeah, it is. David is really sick of Vicente being a drama queen and annoying him.
Vicente is his younger brother. Vicente could have gotten married, and he would have had kids, and the Caballero seedline wouldn’t have died off. The world around them would have been different, and world events would have played out differently. The possibilities are endless, but probably focusing on the family would work? IDK.
David has never invented time travel, lol. He can just do it. The Clockers is a commission of time travelers, and they get together when major crap is going down, and figure out how to fix it. And they have a library of events and can help time travelers etc. I might cut it out though.
I have no idea.
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If it’s whatever is needed to START something.
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I am gonna play around with them both.
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You might not be good at teaching morals, but you’re better than teaching morals than Little Clowns of Happy Town.
Never tell people who can’t swim to save a drowning person. Please, I beg you.
Now I want to read number four and five more
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I have written an excerpt of them both.
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I made a poll with both excerpts:
emphasized text[quote=“JohnnyTuturro, post:7717, topic:7883”]
The possibilities are endless, but probably focusing on the family would work? IDK.
[/quote]
Hmm, if he messed up, and Vincent is still going to be born, that is not threatened. I think you need to find something that has to call him back to the future that actually is important and why he can’t stay in 1960s and be happy there.
If the Clockers are regulators, and David is a maverick and a natural that could be a conflict, but it would escalate easier if Dave is the inventor of the time Tver, their founder, and hence he has to go back to record his travels and experiences and start the Clocker movement. This way, Dave is in conflict and the Clockers are tin conflict, divided between veneration of the guy and the necessity to police him.
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Yeah, I am thinking about that.
What could David save? 
lol.
I just edited post above suggesting a conflict.
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Okay, I mostly was editing today, posting the first 9 chapters. I will need to start reading again tomorrow, plus going back to work… so will be happy if I can do a couple of chapters.
I also gave a shot to fighting Chapter 1 of Firman’s Girl. I hope it might be more hooking now, but I will wait for workshopping it to see if I can get my answer to that. I need 10 chapters to get back into clubbing… that’s my first writing goal once I am done the editing!
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Yeah, and also if the Clockers record any contradictions or differences in the records, then David and them can be conflicted by the records he posted and the ones they post too? If the timeline changes, when they go back.